


Then Came the Young Avengers and Drank the Wine (That Father Bought For Ten Dollars)

by one_of_those_crushing_scenes



Category: Marvel 616, Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Family, Fluff, Gen, Jewish Holidays, M/M, One Shot, Pesach | Passover, Seder, implied amerikate, implied thinkfast
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-13 18:56:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18475054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_of_those_crushing_scenes/pseuds/one_of_those_crushing_scenes
Summary: The Young Avengers are invited to the Kaplans’ house for a Passover seder.





	Then Came the Young Avengers and Drank the Wine (That Father Bought For Ten Dollars)

His navy tie is missing.

He just saw it this morning, he’s almost sure he laid it out with the rest of his clothing, and now there’s no sign of it.

Billy purses his lips and exhales, then gets down on his knees and starts going through his dresser for the third time.

He’s down to the bottom drawer when there’s a single rap on the door and Teddy pokes his head in. “Everything all right?” Teddy asks.

“I can’t find my tie.”

Teddy comes in the rest of the way and closes the door behind him. “The navy one?”

Billy nods.

“I thought I saw it earli—oh, is that it?” Teddy points to the bed, where something is sticking out of the corner of the bedspread, between his pillow and blanket.

“Oh, God.” Billy lets out a sigh of relief and puts his face in his hands. “I’m such a mess. This is a sign. Tonight’s going to be a disaster.”

“It’s going to be fine,” Teddy assures him. “Here, stand up, I’ll do it.” He brings the tie over and drapes it around Billy’s shoulders, then starts to make the knot.

“But what if it’s not?” Billy asks, trying to keep still while Teddy fusses at him. “What if it’s incredibly awkward? America—”

“—will not lose respect for you as the creator of her universe because your family believes in a different creator for this one,” Teddy finishes.

“Kate and Eli—”

“—will be perfectly polite to each other, even though this is the first time they’re seeing each other in years.” He adjusts the length of Billy’s tie, then takes a step back and nods. “Everyone who’s going to be here tonight is someone who loves you, and that’s what matters.” He grins. “Anyway, we’ve fought soul-eating interdimensional monsters; no one’s going to be scared off by some Hebrew songs and a bunch of kids chasing each other around the table with scallions.” He gives Billy a quick kiss on the lips, and Billy feels his nerves start to settle.

“You’re right, you’re right.” He takes a deep breath. “Okay, I’ve got to get out to the kitchen. It’s getting late, and Grandma asked me to do the charoset.”

Teddy’s eyes sparkle. “Already took care of it.”

“She let you make the charoset?” Billy asks, surprised. His grandmother is very exact about the proportions of chopped apples, cinnamon, walnuts, and sweet red wine that go into the recipe. “Wow, she really does like you.”

“What’s not to like?” Teddy says without a hint of false modesty. “Didn’t I tell you? Everything is going to be fine.” He pulls Billy into his arms, and Billy lets himself be held, staying there as his heart rate goes back down to normal.

—

Billy is in the middle of giving his cousin a piggyback ride when his friends start to arrive. David and Tommy get there first, and three-year-old Talia immediately jumps from Billy’s back to Tommy’s as they walk in. David hands Billy’s mother a platter of chocolates with a green sticker showing that its contents are kosher for Passover.

“How thoughtful,” she says, going in for a hug even though she’s never met him before. “It’s always such a pleasure to meet Billy’s superhero friends.”

Billy’s grandfather rises from his chair in order to shake David’s hand, and they get into a conversation about David’s powers, which leads to David showing off a little with some Yiddish expressions that Billy doesn’t understand, but make his grandfather laugh out loud.

Cassie, Kate, and America arrive next. Cassie hangs back a bit, as she often does with new people, but America immediately gravitates toward the children, and pretty soon, she and Tommy are teaching Talia how to do trust falls, and Billy’s brothers have joined in.

“Thanks for inviting us,” Kate says to Billy, looking around at all the family members and the fancy set table extended all the way into the living room. “This is really nice.”

Billy’s father comes out of the kitchen, wiping water and shreds on parsley onto a dishcloth. “Sorry for being antisocial,” he says to Kate. “I’m Jeff.” He gives his hands a final wipe and then sticks a hand out for Kate to shake.

Kate looks absolutely charmed, which makes Billy think of Kate’s father, the emotionally distant multi-millionaire publishing tycoon (and quasi-supervillain?), who would never be caught dead by strangers in this disheveled state. Seeing his family through Kate’s eyes, he’s a little less embarrassed and a little more grateful, which quickly morphs into guilt, like he’s throwing it in his friends’ faces that he has loving, living parents.

Eli's arrival is a nice distraction. He's been out of the state with his family for a few years, and he took their retirement much more literally than the rest of them did, so none of them have seen him in years. He hugs Billy and Teddy as he enters the apartment, then nods awkwardly at Kate.

America pauses her card game with Toby, Billy's ten-year-old brother. “I'm America. I've heard so much about you; it's great to have a face to put to the name.”

The corner of Eli’s mouth turns up a little at her name. “America, huh? I’m Patriot. Are you sure the two of us are allowed to be in the same room at the same time?”

“Oh, Eli made a funny!” Tommy says with a smirk, slapping Eli’s shoulder.

“Yeah, yeah.” Eli shrugs him off, then he catches sight of Cassie and freezes.

Billy’s startled for a second—he knew Cassie was alive, right? This isn’t catching him by surprise?—but Eli just says, “Hey, Cass. Really good to see you.”

“Yeah.” Her voice is quiet, but her face shows how much the reunion means to her. The rest of them already had their emotional reunions with Cassie ages ago, and it must be surreal for him to see her for the first time together with the rest of the group as if nothing had ever happened.

Eli goes to Cassie and gives her a warm hug. When that's done, Billy finishes up the introductions, and then they all make their way to the table to start the seder.

——

“You weren’t kidding when you said this was sweet,” Kate whispers to Billy, putting her wine glass down.

“I’ll finish yours!” Tommy announces. He’s out of his seat and back in a flash, holding Kate’s cup of Manischewitz. “I can’t get enough of this stuff.”

“He can’t get drunk,” Billy explains, in case there’s anyone at the table who isn’t aware of how Tommy’s powers work. “It’s just like drinking syrup for him.”

“Which is a good thing?” his aunt Ellie asks, raising an eyebrow. She’s Talia’s mother and his mother’s sister, but she’s closer to his own age at thirty-one than to his mom’s.

“Sorry about the taste,” his mother says to Kate, whose face is flaming red—she was clearly trying to be discreet about her distaste for the sickly-sweet wine. “We have grape juice, if you’d prefer.”

“If she’s having grape juice, can I have wine instead of her?” asks Adam, Billy’s twelve-year-old brother.

“I’m not sure that logic follows,” Ellie points out.

“I told you, honey, if you’re still awake for the fourth cup, you can have wine then,” Billy’s mother adds.

“Come on, my bar mitzvah is in five months. I’m practically an adult,” Adam insists, evoking a loud snort from Toby.

Talia knocks over her own cup of grape juice, bringing an end to the conversation.

——

“This is the bread of affliction,” Billy's grandfather begins. He holds up the matzah and recites the rest of the paragraph while the rest of the table follows along in the haggadah, each person with their own booklet. “Next year,” he finishes, “we will be free.”

Next on the schedule is the _Ma Nishtana_ , the four questions that ask why this night is different from all other nights. As the youngest person at the table, this part belongs to Talia, but she looks around at all the unfamiliar faces and freezes.

“Come on, Sunshine, just like we practiced,” her father tries to cajole her, but she hides her face in her mother’s shirt instead.

“Adam? Toby?” Billy’s grandmother prompts. “Either of you want to do the honors?”

Billy’s brothers exchange horrified glances. “Grandma, really,” Toby says in an offended tone. “We’re not little kids.”

That leaves Billy next in line, and he really doesn’t want to sing the four questions in front of his friends, but it looks like he doesn’t have a choice, until Tommy says, “I’ll do it!” Then he adds, “But I might need a teeny-tiny bit of help. Talia, do you think you can help me remember the words?”

Talia beams at him and exclaims, “Yeah!” and they both climb up onto their chairs and sing all four questions together while the rest of the table claps along. It’s very impressive, actually—this is only Tommy’s third seder, but he has all of the Hebrew words down pat. They wind down, and everyone applauds.

David helps Tommy get down without knocking anything over, and Billy’s mother asks, “Tommy, that was beautiful! Have you been practicing?”

“Actually, David taught me,” Tommy says.

David smiles sheepishly and admits, “One of our teachers at the Xavier Institute was Jewish, so I have some knowledge through her. Of course, it’s all theoretical; this is my first seder.”

“We’re honored,” Billy’s father says. “Actually, we’re really glad to have all of you.” He looks around at Billy’s friends. “We’ve heard so much about each of you, and aside from the way you make the world a better place, I’m just glad that you make my son’s life a better place.”

Teddy squeezes his hand. It’s more than a little embarrassing, but Billy understands where his father is coming from. High school wasn’t a fun time for him, and the people at this table were the first real friends he had at that point in his life.

His father clears his throat and continues, “Okay, at this point, we have a family tradition where we go around the table and everyone has to identify something unusual about tonight, either something on the table, or something different in our behavior. We’ll give the traditional explanation first, and then each person should keep their choice in mind throughout the evening, and try to come up with an innovative idea about the thing they chose, which they’ll share at the end of the meal.”

“Don’t worry if you can’t come up with a new idea; by the time we’ve had four cups of wine, everyone will have forgotten about it,” Dan, Ellie’s husband, quips. He’s not wrong; they skip the part where they share ‘innovative’ ideas more often than not.

Deferring to tradition, they go around in a circle and each person points something out. There’s the shank bone, which is in memory of the ancient Passover offering; the salt water, representing the tears of the Israelites in Egypt; the charoset, its texture reminiscent of the mortar used in building the Egyptians’ cities; the orange, in support of the LGBTQ+ community; the pillow on each seat to symbolize freedom, and so on and so forth.

Afterward, they each read a paragraph aloud from the haggadah, until they reach _Dayenu_ , the next Hebrew song on the program. Everyone who knows the song (David included, Billy notes) sings along, and everyone who doesn't bangs along on the table.

“‘Dayenu’ means ‘it would have been enough,’” Billy’s mother explains to his friends once the song ends. “Essentially, what we’re doing is breaking up the execution of the Exodus into discrete acts, and saying, ‘Thank You for this thing, and thank You for this thing, and thank You for this thing,’ showing our appreciation for every step along the way.”

“Last year,” Ellie adds, and Billy grins at the memory of what he knows she’s about to say, “we tried to sing it to the tune of ‘That Would Be Enough’ from Hamilton, and it was an unmitigated disaster.”

“Unmitigated,” Billy agrees. “The meter was...it’s not even close.”

“‘Look around, dayenu,’” Ellie sings in demonstration. In her normal voice, she adds, “That was the only thing that fit.”

Teddy picks it up anyway. “‘How long have you known?’”

“‘A month or so,’” Billy and Ellie respond in unison.

Dan continues, “‘Eliza, you should have told me!’”

America and Kate join in, laughing. “‘I wrote to the General a month ago!’”

“Uh, what’s going on?” Adam says, looking around. “Are we having a—”

“‘I begged him to send you home!’” Tommy belts out.

“—Hamilton sing-along?”

——

When they finish with the storytelling and the songs, they drink the second cup, and Billy begins to feel pleasantly mellow. They pass around the matzah, which turns out to be a big hit among his friends, to his surprise. Next, everyone gets a piece of lettuce sprinkled with freshly grated horseradish, symbolizing the bitterness of slavery, topped with a small amount of charoset. Kate’s face starts to redden after her first bite.

“Oh, no, you must have gotten too much horseradish in yours,” Billy’s grandmother says. “Here, dear, take some more charoset, that'll ease the blow.” She passes the crystal serving dish over to Kate, who smiles gratefully and scoops it onto her plate.

The seder plate is removed from the table, and the meal commences. Billy leans over to Kate and whispers, “Skip the gefilte fish.” She turns and gives him a shocked look, like she would never be so gauche as to turn down food offered by her hosts, but he adds, “Trust me.” When the platter of wet fish patties is brought out and passed around, she catches his eye and nods in understanding.

Unfortunately for the rest of his friends, they're not in whispering distance. Billy has to admit to himself that it's a little funny watching the expressions on their faces as they try to choke it down. Teddy and Tommy are fine, since they're both adventurous eaters and they've eaten gefilte fish before—they both smother their fish in pink horseradish sauce before eating, and Tommy cleans his plate enthusiastically, even going back for seconds. America and David follow his example with the horseradish and manage to finish off their pieces, while Eli and Cassie cut theirs into very small pieces in order to make it seem like they've eaten more than they actually have. 

The rest of the meal is much more appetizing: chicken soup with matzah balls, pickled brisket, garden salad, roasted root vegetables with rosemary, garlicky baby potatoes, sautéed asparagus and mushrooms, and the traditional hard-boiled egg dipped in salt water. As soon as the eggs are served, Toby slices his in half lengthwise and sets it afloat in the serving dish of salt water.

“Look!” he exclaims proudly. “It's Moses in the ark!”

“Gross, I'm not using that water,” Adam huffs. “Mom, did you see what he did?”

“But I didn't put my mouth on it,” Toby argues. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Billy catches a glimpse of America mouthing to Kate, _Who's Moses?_

Adam looks back at the floating egg and screws up his face. “The water's all cloudy now.”

“I'll get a fresh bowl,” Billy's grandmother says, starting to get up, but his mother puts out an arm to stop her.

“Ma, don't. He can do it himself.” She nods in Toby's direction. “We're all very proud of your creative propensity, but next time, get your own bowl before you start experimenting, please.” Grumbling, Toby gets up and heads to the kitchen.

Once the food is gone, it's time for the children to search the house for the afikoman, the broken piece of matzah that Billy's father hid away at the beginning of the seder. Talia is asleep on the couch by now, so Billy's brothers are left to look by themselves. 

“And no enlisting Tommy to help you find it this year!” Billy's father adds with a laugh.

“How about Billy?” Adam asks. “I bet he can find it with magic!” 

“If I find the afikoman for you, I'm not sharing my prize,” Billy warns him.

“Boo,” Adam retorts. He turns to the guests. “Do any of you have any good finding-stuff powers?” 

The Young Avengers exchange glances. “I can get really small,” Cassie offers. “But I'm not sure how that'll help.”

“I can help find it if it's in another dimension,” America adds. 

Adam sighs. “I guess we'll have to do it the regular way.”

——

After the third cup, Billy’s grandfather picks up a bottle of wine and says, “Okay, where’s Elijah’s cup?” Eli looks up, and Billy’s grandfather corrects himself. “The prophet Elijah, sorry. Anyone seen it?”

The porcelain Cup of Elijah is in the middle of the table, untouched; Dan passes it down, and Billy’s grandfather fills it to the brim with the Manischewitz. Meanwhile, Adam and Toby race to the door.

“Not yet, not yet!” Billy’s grandfather calls as he pours. He turns to the guests and explains, “Traditionally, Elijah is supposed to announce the final redemption, so we invite him to the seder. He hasn’t come to any of ours yet, but Jewish people are good at waiting.” He chuckles at his own joke, then puts the wine bottle back on the table and calls out, “You can open the door now!”

There’s the sound of the door opening, and then Toby’s confused voice floats in from the front hall. “Uh, are you Elijah?”

It sounds like he’s making a joke, but to everyone’s surprise, someone answers. “Sadly, I am not.”

Oh, no. Billy recognizes that voice.

The new guest continues. “Men call me...Magneto!”

Billy buries his face in his hands.

—

Billy is in the kitchen, crouching in front of the fridge, looking for the mousse cake while his mother takes out the dessert plates.

“I think it’s the next shelf down,” she says to him. “Listen, I’m sorry. I ran into him in the supermarket, I said he should stop by for dessert. I didn’t think he would take me up on it.”

A blur whizzes by next to them—Tommy, clearing the table and loading dirty dishes into the dishwasher.

“You ran into _Magneto_ at the supermarket? Just, what, browsing the Passover aisle at Fairway?”

“Well, is it so strange? He needs to eat like everyone else, doesn’t he?”

Billy rubs his forehead. Okay. There’s a famous supervillain in his dining room sitting in between his superhero friends and his non-powered family. Great. That’s not at all a powder keg waiting to explode. Okay, said supervillain is family, and he seems to have come in peace, but what if someone starts talking about mutant-human relations? What if someone asks Magneto about his past? What if— 

“Okay, that’s everything,” Tommy says, coming to a stop in between them. “What should I bring out? Oh, by the way, Magneto brought this thing called ‘fruit slices,’ do you know what that is? It doesn’t look like fruit. Should I plate it?”

——

At the conclusion of the evening, Adam, Teddy, Ellie, and Magneto put on a performance of ‘Who Knows One’ for the family.

“—days before a brit milah, and four are the days of the—”

Adam interrupts. “ _Seven_ are the days of the week!”

“Right, that’s what I meant,” Magneto says, slapping his forehead.

Ellie continues, “And six are the books of the—”

“Mishna!” Teddy answers.

“And five are the books of the—”

“Torah!”

All together, they chant, “And four are the mommas, and three are the poppas, and two are the tablets that Moses brought!”

Kate yawns and rests her head on America’s shoulder. “This was fun,” America says. 

It was, he has to admit. “Was it weird?” he asks.

“What, seeing my world’s deity involved in his own religious ritual?” She shrugs her free shoulder as she puts her arm around Kate. “It’s not the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Told you,” Teddy points out. “Are you coming back next year?”

“If we’re invited.”

Billy smiles. “Yeah, I think I’d like that.”

Cassie leans across the table and asks, “Hey, is there any more of that matzah?”

**Author's Note:**

> Magneto showing up at the end of the meal is a reference to his appearance at Wanda and Vision's Thanksgiving dinner in Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #6.


End file.
